October 3, 2024
Not long after I moved to North Carolina, I received a heartbreaking phone call. It was about Jan. He was a member of my former church back in Missouri. Jan was a kind, but troubled person. He had a warm smile and was always quick with a joke. But Jan also suffered from severe depression and was very open about his struggles both mentally and emotionally. A member of the church had called to tell me that Jan had died by suicide.
I immediately called Jan’s wife Margaret. Together on the phone, we cried and told stories about Jan. I asked Margaret what she needed right now. She paused and said, “I don’t want to hear anybody tell me it’s going to be okay. I don’t want anybody to try to make me feel better. For right now, I just need people to sit in my pain with me.”
When writing to the Christians gathered in Rome, the Apostle Paul gives them instructions for being community with one another. Paul writes: Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. (Romans 12:15) Notice that Paul is not calling the Christians to sympathize with one another, but he is calling them to empathy. See, “sympathy” is a feeling of concern for someone going through something difficult, but “empathy” is the ability to understand and even share someone’s feelings.
Empathy is an essential part of the Christian journey. Jesus’ command for us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves is more than just a measure of degree; it is an invitation for us to enter into empathy with others so that the love we have for our own experiences and the knowledge we have of theirs begins to meld together.
This upcoming weekend, a wonderful friend of mine will be with us at Ardmore Baptist Church to guide us through understanding the role empathy plays in our faith. Rev. Christy S. Edwards is a board-certified pediatric hospital chaplain in Kansas City, Missouri. She and her husband, Jason, have three children. Christy earned her Master of Divinity degree from Truett Seminary at Baylor University. She has lived and worked on four continents and traveled to over 25 countries. In her spare time, Christy enjoys reading, running, and spending time with friends.
On Friday and Saturday, Christy will be with our Deacon Council for their annual Deacon Retreat. She will be guiding us in understanding the role that empathy plays in leadership. Then on Sunday morning, Christy will be preaching for our World Communion Sunday service (note: we will gather together for the 10:45 service only that day).
Each of us has a calling to love one another. To rejoice with those who rejoice and to weep with those who weep.
If you or someone you love is struggling with mental/emotional health, you are not alone. You can call or text 988 to reach someone to speak with about how you can get some help.
